Good Grief

Grief

Not just about starving babies and children

Not just about those who get bullied or killed

Just because

My grief is not just about losing family members

And loved ones to other states of being or venues

Not just about early childhood and whatever neglect

Or traumas this little body and heart experienced

No

Grief is much more than that

It socks me in the gut

Knocks me down to my knees

To grovel on the ground

To cry and scream

Feeling powerless and 

Unable to change

Some of what I would like to 

Change

That's the real grief

That I don't have control over

My body

My time

My energy

My loved ones

The world, its people

Its animals and other beings

Who suffer so much

Not much control at all

That's just true about being human

And though, that doesn't mean

I will stop trying to correct

Some of the hurtful things I do

Or say. I can try to influence what

Other people do or say that can

Crucify others

Injure and damage others but

No one seems to be able 

To change all that

I can leap into the spiritual realm

And try to stay there for as long

As possible, knowing

Feeling that we are intimately

Connected within and to the Divine

Merging in bliss

I can live there in

That bright white delicious place

Sometimes plummeting back to

Earth again

Beginning anew with good intentions and

A far better mood about life and love

Only to find myself cascading once 

Again to the tyrannies of technology

To the oppression I see and feel all around me

I sometimes slip into my most judgmental parts

Ot rather into hell, I call it

Good Grief is setting the stage

I hear these words, “Arise!

Keep connected to humans

To other beings

To the Divine

You can bring more 

Joy, more bliss, more love 

To all the world, Mother Earth

To the galaxies and to the

Infinite cosmos herself

You are eternal”

Inside those words I find my purpose

Why I came here in the first place

To improve my health and well-being

To contribute, to gather and

Connect with all living beings

Collaborate with others

Spread goodness, compassion and 

Love all around 

Everywhere I go

As a gardener

A midwife

A mother

A friend

Part of a community

A participant in all that is

Sharing seeds of what I know

And who I am

What I have learned about, like

How we can all live better

Creating more satisfying lives

More often

Good Grief

Not just for the faint of heart

Just another side of Love

Creating a whole 

The Holy

Never Alone Again

Dry desert with hot, streaming sun

Lying on my back facing upwards

Black Birds pecking at my abdomen

Deeply rolling thunder all around

The message I thought I heard

All of my life was

“You need to feed the world”

Which somehow got transformed into

“You need to be the food”

So, imagine my disgust and dislike

Of these birds poking around in my belly

I thought I must be their food

(Which I don’t object to if my

Body has died and I have moved on)

But, the activity wasn’t painful 

Or wretched at all

Actually, clarifying

I am alone

All alone in this dry desert

(Except for the crows and

The Sun, sand, and cacti
Silly me)

Now, I see and feel these

Black crows stitching me up

As if they are seamstresses and 

I am a cloth, they are using

Thread and instruments

To piece me together

Into better working order

Recreating, restoring, renewing

What has been before

Knitting in expansions between 

The capillaries and the arteries

Maintaining a steady flow of

Life, blood, and water

As if they were galactic 

Elemental creatures

Technicians, technologists

Just doing their jobs

Helping this human body

Achieve better health and well-being

A snake begins to loosen my joints

(Those arthritic ones that seem

All crunched up together)

Releasing my neck

Pulling the bones away from

The nerves all the way down my spinal

Column, relaxing and soothing the

Jammed packed channel

Opening up to the Mystery

To Mother Plasma

Machines hover over me

Again, helping to heal old and

New wounds, taking stuff apart

Putting it back together 

Creating new connections

Networking webs all around 

The sore spots bringing more 

Oxygen to every cell, organ, space

I now know that I am 

Not alone in the vast expanse of

This world, Mother Earth, and

Any other worlds around us

Now I hear new

Words for my feelings:

I am never alone with

Stars, suns, heat, cold, galaxies

Black holes, magnetism, and love

Beasts, trees, flowers and plants

I rest now connected with both

Human and divine energies

Emptiness and abundance

Intertwined together

Never Alone again

Home Eternal

Floating out over the sea 

Air currents joyfully maneuver us

As we ride this rainbow filled with light

Wandering through the Mystery 

We fly, glide, dance, and sing

Into the darkness and depths

Whether beasts or birds 

Walking, running on land

Sea and space swimming

Swoop throughout the clouds

Chanting melodies and harmony 

Alone and together

Imagine the collective We

Humming, weeping, fluting

Wailing, laughing, loving

Drumming, crying

Hearts beating in tune

Touching, smiling sweetly

Soothing our edges and

Sanding down the coarseness

Energy bursts like solar storms

Whetting our appetites 

With desire, we move toward 

Each other

Sometimes colliding 

Sometimes collapsing

Sometimes embracing

Inquiry into the mystery

Not searching for concrete answers

No specific problems to be solved

Surrendering to the swirling dynamics 

That just are

Worth the risk, the possible

Joy, harm, pain and hope

Holding on to each other tightly

And then, letting go completely

Sailing through the cosmos

Traveling to wherever home is

Magnetic forces guide us

Drawing us down into our places

Moons, suns, stars, planets

Gases, particles, waves and dust

Remembering

Returning to where we all began

Never-ending and infinite 

We know the truths of our

Eternal homes

Not spoken 

Not written

Just felt